I was talking to a stranger...
I’m talking to a stranger in a bar the other day (well, he’s talking to me and I’m nodding and shaking my head in what I hope are the appropriate places) and he starts to dis Scotland.
“You know, I’m a Scot,” I tell him.
His eyes narrow. “Oh yeah,” he says, blowing smoke all over my new wool suit. “Well you don’t look Scottish; more… Jewish.”
“So I’m a Scottish Jew,” I reply.
It’s true. I am a Scot, although I’ve lived in exile the best part of my life (and I do mean the best part), mostly in London.
And I do have a distant hint of Hebrew blood.
All of which is my way of introducing some posts about Scotland (and tobacco).
Can you smell the heather?
SMOKING was banned in public places in Scotland last month.
Yesterday an 85 year old Dundee man’s family blamed the ban for his death.
Jim Donachie goes to light up his customary cigar in his local bar and is told by the barman: “Sorry Jim, it’s the new law. You’ll have to smoke it outside.”
So, he’s walking to the exit and falls forward, striking his head on the bar counter. An ambulance is called and he’s taken to hospital. Sadly, he later dies.
Jim’s son, Stewart, is angry:
“If the ban hadn’t come in he would have still been here today.”
Perhaps, but for how long?
PRISON CELLS are exempt under the legislation because they are classified as “domestic spaces”.
Much to the displeasure of many prison officers, who are worried about the health risks incurred by entering the cells of prisoners who smoke.
They have been advised to ask inmates to extinguish their cigarettes and then to wait two or three minutes before entering.
However union leaders say each visit to a “smoking cell” should be entered in the accident book, and they have asked for tests to be carried out to determine how long toxins remain in an enclosed atmosphere after a cigarette is extinguished.
The Scottish Executive is aware also that Ministers could face damaging legal actions from non-smoking inmates forced to share cells with smokers.
How long, do you think, before the Executive is compelled to change the law?
A BARTENDER was punched in the face and had a glass smashed over his head at an Edinburgh pub as he attempted to enforce the ban.
“The guy was with a group who had been drinking for four or five hours,” said the victim. “He lit up so I asked him to go outside.
“He came up to the bar blowing smoke in my face and shouting ‘Who the f*** are you to tell me what to do? I can smoke where I f***ing like! He then punched me above my eye. I stumbled back and he threw a glass at me, which missed. He then threw another, which hit me on the back of the head.”
The assailant warned the barman not to take the matter any further, before drinking up and leaving the premises.
Lothian and Borders police are trying to identify the attacker from the pub’s CCTV footage.
Perhaps, as well as a smoking ban there should be some limit on how long drinkers are allowed to booze before being asked to curb their intake?
BOOTS say nicotine replacement products sales have doubled since the ban came into force, particularly in Glasgow, with figures for skin patches up 110% on last year.
Smokers can monitor their progress on the road to smoke-free lives using “smokerlysers”, which the company has installed in most of its major stores.
The tests may be free but the cost of patches and other products is exorbitant (I used them to kick the habit myself earlier in the year).
A survey by Boots indicated that smokers are willing to spend upwards of £100 to quit.
Everybody wins.
FINALLY… An Edinburgh Fringe venue manager has decided to rebel against the ban on smoking on stage, on the grounds that it “interferes with art”.
Appeals to the Scottish Executive from theatre producers were denied; it was suggested they use fake cigarettes with powder instead.
But many actors and producers have complained bitterly, insisting that they must be allowed to smoke “realistically” when their characters’ parts demand it.
Tomek Borkowky (a fine old Scottish name that), who runs the Hill Street Theatre at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe, and who stopped smoking 10 years ago, said:
“How do I react to a company that is coming from down south or abroad and they have smoking on stage? I have to ban the scene with the cigarette or break the law. I decided to break the law.
“This is an interference with art. It shows how our beautiful (???) politicians don’t think about the art and the theatre at all. They don’t give a damn. I will go as far as the European Court of Human Rights.”
I wish you the best of British luck, Tomek.
www.news.scotsman.com
“You know, I’m a Scot,” I tell him.
His eyes narrow. “Oh yeah,” he says, blowing smoke all over my new wool suit. “Well you don’t look Scottish; more… Jewish.”
“So I’m a Scottish Jew,” I reply.
It’s true. I am a Scot, although I’ve lived in exile the best part of my life (and I do mean the best part), mostly in London.
And I do have a distant hint of Hebrew blood.
All of which is my way of introducing some posts about Scotland (and tobacco).
Can you smell the heather?
SMOKING was banned in public places in Scotland last month.
Yesterday an 85 year old Dundee man’s family blamed the ban for his death.
Jim Donachie goes to light up his customary cigar in his local bar and is told by the barman: “Sorry Jim, it’s the new law. You’ll have to smoke it outside.”
So, he’s walking to the exit and falls forward, striking his head on the bar counter. An ambulance is called and he’s taken to hospital. Sadly, he later dies.
Jim’s son, Stewart, is angry:
“If the ban hadn’t come in he would have still been here today.”
Perhaps, but for how long?
PRISON CELLS are exempt under the legislation because they are classified as “domestic spaces”.
Much to the displeasure of many prison officers, who are worried about the health risks incurred by entering the cells of prisoners who smoke.
They have been advised to ask inmates to extinguish their cigarettes and then to wait two or three minutes before entering.
However union leaders say each visit to a “smoking cell” should be entered in the accident book, and they have asked for tests to be carried out to determine how long toxins remain in an enclosed atmosphere after a cigarette is extinguished.
The Scottish Executive is aware also that Ministers could face damaging legal actions from non-smoking inmates forced to share cells with smokers.
How long, do you think, before the Executive is compelled to change the law?
A BARTENDER was punched in the face and had a glass smashed over his head at an Edinburgh pub as he attempted to enforce the ban.
“The guy was with a group who had been drinking for four or five hours,” said the victim. “He lit up so I asked him to go outside.
“He came up to the bar blowing smoke in my face and shouting ‘Who the f*** are you to tell me what to do? I can smoke where I f***ing like! He then punched me above my eye. I stumbled back and he threw a glass at me, which missed. He then threw another, which hit me on the back of the head.”
The assailant warned the barman not to take the matter any further, before drinking up and leaving the premises.
Lothian and Borders police are trying to identify the attacker from the pub’s CCTV footage.
Perhaps, as well as a smoking ban there should be some limit on how long drinkers are allowed to booze before being asked to curb their intake?
BOOTS say nicotine replacement products sales have doubled since the ban came into force, particularly in Glasgow, with figures for skin patches up 110% on last year.
Smokers can monitor their progress on the road to smoke-free lives using “smokerlysers”, which the company has installed in most of its major stores.
The tests may be free but the cost of patches and other products is exorbitant (I used them to kick the habit myself earlier in the year).
A survey by Boots indicated that smokers are willing to spend upwards of £100 to quit.
Everybody wins.
FINALLY… An Edinburgh Fringe venue manager has decided to rebel against the ban on smoking on stage, on the grounds that it “interferes with art”.
Appeals to the Scottish Executive from theatre producers were denied; it was suggested they use fake cigarettes with powder instead.
But many actors and producers have complained bitterly, insisting that they must be allowed to smoke “realistically” when their characters’ parts demand it.
Tomek Borkowky (a fine old Scottish name that), who runs the Hill Street Theatre at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe, and who stopped smoking 10 years ago, said:
“How do I react to a company that is coming from down south or abroad and they have smoking on stage? I have to ban the scene with the cigarette or break the law. I decided to break the law.
“This is an interference with art. It shows how our beautiful (???) politicians don’t think about the art and the theatre at all. They don’t give a damn. I will go as far as the European Court of Human Rights.”
I wish you the best of British luck, Tomek.
www.news.scotsman.com
posted by Don Galloway at 2:24 PM
2 Comments:
funny
Thanks anocsanamun. One word can mean so much. But, how is it funny?
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